My brother, Erick, is so heaven-sent! I've been thinking of words to start this entry with and finally found them in his text message:
I cried because I had no shoes 'til I saw a man with no feet." Life is full of blessings, sometimes we're just too blind to see them.
I resolved in my heart to be thankful for whatever God has given me for the day starting July 1 and I recorded them all in my journal. I'm so amazed at the very things I'm so grateful for. Sometimes so petty, but really, is there such a thing? If I can't be grateful for the littlest things that come my way, how can I appreciate the big ones?
So what are the things I'm most thankful for? Here are the highlights:
1. God gave me the phone I’ve been praying for at an amount lower than my budget. This phone is truly an answered prayer! He gave me the money for it and he directed me to the right seller. I love this phone!
2. My sister, Weng, is already enrolled. And God also answered my prayer and provided for her tuition fee. I have, oftentimes, cried to God, with regard to my siblings’ schooling and other stuff. But I know my God provides, and He does so right on time. Never too early, never too late. And I’ve learned to trust His providence in everything, since college! Grabe! Looking back to my college and even high school days, I’m amazed at how God provided for my every need, RIGHT ON TIME! I learned, early on, how to trust my God for my “daily bread.” I love this verse from the Bible for it lifts me up when I start to worry: But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Mt 6:33-34)
3. I was able to control my temper in the workplace. Confession: when I’m super stressed at work, you’ll hear it. As in I’ll slam my desk or the doors of my cabinet or hit the keyboard with a vengeance, as if doing so will relieve the stress. But when I’m truly angry, you won’t hear a word from me, not one sound. I’ll completely ignore you. I don’t have the strength to speak to anybody. It’s either I’ll cry or I’ll scream. So I prefer low-key. “In your anger, do not sin” (Psalm 4:4), I believe in that. So better be silent than sin.
If you’re in the travel industry, you’ll understand how stressful my job can be. I handle sales and marketing, and at times, reservations. I can’t really put a label to my kind of work because my boss believes in multi-tasking. And I’m thankful for that because I’m able to stretch my skills and work on my weaknesses. For those who know me real well, you’ll be amazed at how creative I can be now, hehe! I know God has called me in the travel industry, and he has equipped me with the skills I need to survive and make an impact in this industry.
And I’ve been trying to work on that weakness: my temper. Now I’m able to control it (sometimes!). I don’t slam things down anymore, unless I forgot that I’m supposed to be Christ like in every way. But I know God’s grace is abundant.
4. My cousins, Bebs and Mayak (14 and 12 yrs old). I thank God for them because they now make my life easier, hehe! Really! They can cook, clean the house, throw the trash, wash the dishes, iron clothes, you name it, they can do it (except, of course, things too hard for their still frail hands). I’m sort of part of their training because I live with them since 1996, and I can be so OC at times..okay, all the time! I remember one time I was teaching them how to fold their clothes, and I won’t get contented with “pwede na” kind of fold, so I made them do it again. They got so frustrated because children only want to play and they can’t play unless they are finished with their chore. So Bebs devised a way to make it perfect the first time and when I arrived home, she showed it to me. She took one cardboard, took one shirt and folded it using the board as guideline. Then she pulled the cardboard, and true enough it was perfect! She was so proud and I, humbled. Grabe! I repented that night. The next morning, I told them it’s okay even if their fold is not perfect. Whatever they can do, I accept it.
Mayak, on the other hand, is a very observant girl. She looks at me when I do things. And maybe she took after me as an OC. This terrifies me at times. It’s so scary when you see yourself in a child. Okay lang if it’s good, but what if she emulates the bad? Yikes! Anyway, I notice that when she cleans the house, she follows my pattern. Wipe, sweep, mop the floor with soap, bleach and water, and sweep again. Top to bottom, inside to outside. And she loves decorating the house. Very orderly. And when you mess it up, she gets mad (so very me!!!). She also follows after me who collects boxes, paper bags, and other “pretty stuff” as she calls it. She adores my stuff and can’t wait to inherit them! Imagine talking me into marriage and God forbid, dying (later, oo naman, pero ngayon?!), so she can have my stuff!!! I sometimes catch her opening my cabinet and admiring my stuff (but really, these are only boxes, paper bags, baskets, etc). I imagine her thinking: “when I grow up, I’ll have all these and more!” When I give her a box as a gift, her eyes light up, as if I’ve given her something much more valuable. But then again, that, to her, is valuable.
5. Talking with my cousin Maymay. I miss her so much and I miss our times together. That’s why I’ve spent almost every night talking to her about anything I can think of. What I feel about my friends, family, work, future, love, etc. Even if we sleep at 2am, it’s worth it!
6. The power of choice. I watched two movies about it: Butterfly Effect and If Only and I wrote these on my journal:
Your choices can have a positive or negative effect on others. Your fate and those of the people around you is affected by what you CHOOSE to do now! Choose to be real, be vulnerable, be known, be seen as who you are by others. Let go and LOVE freely! Open up! Trust others with your emotions. Show them how much you love them! Why do you love them? What would you do if you only have one day to live?…LOVE!
This is the freedom God has given us: CHOICE, FREEWILL. What will you do with it? How differently you’d live your life, right?
Well, I’m talking to myself really. But, think about it…
7. Worrying…Okay, I worry about anything, but mostly about family. But I thank God I worry, though it’s not a healthy thing to do, because I am reminded of how powerless I am to change my and my family’s situation. Because of worry I am always on my knees before God. Maybe, if I don’t worry, I’d be proud. Proud in a bad way. I don’t know. But I believe, each one of us is given something, a weakness, that God’s strength may be manifested in our life. My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness (2Cor 12:9).
8. Friends…need I say more? The people who hold the other end of the rope for me. Thank you so much! Friends are a precious gift from God. Friends who listen to me, understand me, won’t be afraid to correct, rebuke or simply be honest with me, do anything for me, trust me completely, love me wholeheartedly, support me, protect me, lift me up and encourage me, share my joys and heartaches, know me and accept me as I am, go places with me, be willing to risk anything to help me, won’t break a vow or promise made to me, be in every important day or event in my life (past, present, future), be a significant part of me and my family, etc. So many “me”, but hey! this is about me! But I pray that I’ll also be this kind of friend to somebody.
9. Family. Papi, Mami, Kuya Raycel, Joy, Em-em, Erick, Abet, Tintin, Biboy, Weng. I miss them all! Just thinking about them brings tears to my eyes. I want to do things for them, give them all that they need, as long as I have it. If only I could, I’d spare them from so much hurt and suffering. But if that is God’s way, who am I to interfere? I can only intercede but not be god in their life.
I’ve written in my journal that it is my dilemma. The slightest hint of discomfort my family feels, I run, complain even, and appeal their case before God. But my prayer has always been: “Lord, shake them that your glory may be made known in their life.” Tsk.tsk.tsk. Dangerous prayer. Still I believe, they are my greatest blessing from God. Though not perfect, they are just the right family for me. I am who I am now because of them.
I wanted to write so much more. But time and space won’t be enough. It will take me an eternity to enumerate all the things I’m grateful for. But most of all, (10) I’m thankful for the love of God. For Jesus, who died on the cross that I might know salvation, be restored to God and have this most amazing relationship with Him! For dealing with my sinfulness every day of my life. For changing me and making me Christ like in every way, even if I sometimes reject Him and His commands. For not giving up on me, when I felt like giving up on Him. For restoring me when I felt so lost. For always lifting me up, encouraging me, and simply loving me. For being my comfort at times when I felt so alone, depressed and hopeless. For being my Lord, Savior, Lover, Friend, Provider, Protector, etc.
Lord, what would I be without you? At 26, I’ve only learned and grasped a pinch of you. I long for more and I know you’ll bring me to greater heights with a deeper understanding of who you are and can be in my life. Thank you!
I cried because I had no shoes 'til I saw a man with no feet." Life is full of blessings, sometimes we're just too blind to see them.
I resolved in my heart to be thankful for whatever God has given me for the day starting July 1 and I recorded them all in my journal. I'm so amazed at the very things I'm so grateful for. Sometimes so petty, but really, is there such a thing? If I can't be grateful for the littlest things that come my way, how can I appreciate the big ones?
So what are the things I'm most thankful for? Here are the highlights:
1. God gave me the phone I’ve been praying for at an amount lower than my budget. This phone is truly an answered prayer! He gave me the money for it and he directed me to the right seller. I love this phone!
2. My sister, Weng, is already enrolled. And God also answered my prayer and provided for her tuition fee. I have, oftentimes, cried to God, with regard to my siblings’ schooling and other stuff. But I know my God provides, and He does so right on time. Never too early, never too late. And I’ve learned to trust His providence in everything, since college! Grabe! Looking back to my college and even high school days, I’m amazed at how God provided for my every need, RIGHT ON TIME! I learned, early on, how to trust my God for my “daily bread.” I love this verse from the Bible for it lifts me up when I start to worry: But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Mt 6:33-34)
3. I was able to control my temper in the workplace. Confession: when I’m super stressed at work, you’ll hear it. As in I’ll slam my desk or the doors of my cabinet or hit the keyboard with a vengeance, as if doing so will relieve the stress. But when I’m truly angry, you won’t hear a word from me, not one sound. I’ll completely ignore you. I don’t have the strength to speak to anybody. It’s either I’ll cry or I’ll scream. So I prefer low-key. “In your anger, do not sin” (Psalm 4:4), I believe in that. So better be silent than sin.
If you’re in the travel industry, you’ll understand how stressful my job can be. I handle sales and marketing, and at times, reservations. I can’t really put a label to my kind of work because my boss believes in multi-tasking. And I’m thankful for that because I’m able to stretch my skills and work on my weaknesses. For those who know me real well, you’ll be amazed at how creative I can be now, hehe! I know God has called me in the travel industry, and he has equipped me with the skills I need to survive and make an impact in this industry.
And I’ve been trying to work on that weakness: my temper. Now I’m able to control it (sometimes!). I don’t slam things down anymore, unless I forgot that I’m supposed to be Christ like in every way. But I know God’s grace is abundant.
4. My cousins, Bebs and Mayak (14 and 12 yrs old). I thank God for them because they now make my life easier, hehe! Really! They can cook, clean the house, throw the trash, wash the dishes, iron clothes, you name it, they can do it (except, of course, things too hard for their still frail hands). I’m sort of part of their training because I live with them since 1996, and I can be so OC at times..okay, all the time! I remember one time I was teaching them how to fold their clothes, and I won’t get contented with “pwede na” kind of fold, so I made them do it again. They got so frustrated because children only want to play and they can’t play unless they are finished with their chore. So Bebs devised a way to make it perfect the first time and when I arrived home, she showed it to me. She took one cardboard, took one shirt and folded it using the board as guideline. Then she pulled the cardboard, and true enough it was perfect! She was so proud and I, humbled. Grabe! I repented that night. The next morning, I told them it’s okay even if their fold is not perfect. Whatever they can do, I accept it.
Mayak, on the other hand, is a very observant girl. She looks at me when I do things. And maybe she took after me as an OC. This terrifies me at times. It’s so scary when you see yourself in a child. Okay lang if it’s good, but what if she emulates the bad? Yikes! Anyway, I notice that when she cleans the house, she follows my pattern. Wipe, sweep, mop the floor with soap, bleach and water, and sweep again. Top to bottom, inside to outside. And she loves decorating the house. Very orderly. And when you mess it up, she gets mad (so very me!!!). She also follows after me who collects boxes, paper bags, and other “pretty stuff” as she calls it. She adores my stuff and can’t wait to inherit them! Imagine talking me into marriage and God forbid, dying (later, oo naman, pero ngayon?!), so she can have my stuff!!! I sometimes catch her opening my cabinet and admiring my stuff (but really, these are only boxes, paper bags, baskets, etc). I imagine her thinking: “when I grow up, I’ll have all these and more!” When I give her a box as a gift, her eyes light up, as if I’ve given her something much more valuable. But then again, that, to her, is valuable.
5. Talking with my cousin Maymay. I miss her so much and I miss our times together. That’s why I’ve spent almost every night talking to her about anything I can think of. What I feel about my friends, family, work, future, love, etc. Even if we sleep at 2am, it’s worth it!
6. The power of choice. I watched two movies about it: Butterfly Effect and If Only and I wrote these on my journal:
Your choices can have a positive or negative effect on others. Your fate and those of the people around you is affected by what you CHOOSE to do now! Choose to be real, be vulnerable, be known, be seen as who you are by others. Let go and LOVE freely! Open up! Trust others with your emotions. Show them how much you love them! Why do you love them? What would you do if you only have one day to live?…LOVE!
This is the freedom God has given us: CHOICE, FREEWILL. What will you do with it? How differently you’d live your life, right?
Well, I’m talking to myself really. But, think about it…
7. Worrying…Okay, I worry about anything, but mostly about family. But I thank God I worry, though it’s not a healthy thing to do, because I am reminded of how powerless I am to change my and my family’s situation. Because of worry I am always on my knees before God. Maybe, if I don’t worry, I’d be proud. Proud in a bad way. I don’t know. But I believe, each one of us is given something, a weakness, that God’s strength may be manifested in our life. My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness (2Cor 12:9).
8. Friends…need I say more? The people who hold the other end of the rope for me. Thank you so much! Friends are a precious gift from God. Friends who listen to me, understand me, won’t be afraid to correct, rebuke or simply be honest with me, do anything for me, trust me completely, love me wholeheartedly, support me, protect me, lift me up and encourage me, share my joys and heartaches, know me and accept me as I am, go places with me, be willing to risk anything to help me, won’t break a vow or promise made to me, be in every important day or event in my life (past, present, future), be a significant part of me and my family, etc. So many “me”, but hey! this is about me! But I pray that I’ll also be this kind of friend to somebody.
9. Family. Papi, Mami, Kuya Raycel, Joy, Em-em, Erick, Abet, Tintin, Biboy, Weng. I miss them all! Just thinking about them brings tears to my eyes. I want to do things for them, give them all that they need, as long as I have it. If only I could, I’d spare them from so much hurt and suffering. But if that is God’s way, who am I to interfere? I can only intercede but not be god in their life.
I’ve written in my journal that it is my dilemma. The slightest hint of discomfort my family feels, I run, complain even, and appeal their case before God. But my prayer has always been: “Lord, shake them that your glory may be made known in their life.” Tsk.tsk.tsk. Dangerous prayer. Still I believe, they are my greatest blessing from God. Though not perfect, they are just the right family for me. I am who I am now because of them.
I wanted to write so much more. But time and space won’t be enough. It will take me an eternity to enumerate all the things I’m grateful for. But most of all, (10) I’m thankful for the love of God. For Jesus, who died on the cross that I might know salvation, be restored to God and have this most amazing relationship with Him! For dealing with my sinfulness every day of my life. For changing me and making me Christ like in every way, even if I sometimes reject Him and His commands. For not giving up on me, when I felt like giving up on Him. For restoring me when I felt so lost. For always lifting me up, encouraging me, and simply loving me. For being my comfort at times when I felt so alone, depressed and hopeless. For being my Lord, Savior, Lover, Friend, Provider, Protector, etc.
Lord, what would I be without you? At 26, I’ve only learned and grasped a pinch of you. I long for more and I know you’ll bring me to greater heights with a deeper understanding of who you are and can be in my life. Thank you!
3 comments:
Riz,
My birthday wish for you this year is that you get better acquainted with your true self and live it out more boldly and with flair.
I also pray that you take better care of yourself. You have a very compassionate heart. You have the gift of service. But to be able to take better care of others, you must prioritize yourself and your health. Ang vitamins wag kakalimutan!
I also wish that you realize that you are more gorgeous than Jennifer Garner inside out! I pray that you will set aside some budget to have your photo professionally taken now that you are 26. Ewan ko, basta trip ko lang. And that you will put that photo up in Friendster and your 2 other blogs.
I also pray that you hear specific marching orders from God re: your career, ministry and future family, so that you can move forward with grace and confidence.
I also wish na mafeel mo sobra-sobra through your family, friends, church, nature, work, (everything in all creation! o di ba?) how loved and cherished you truly are.
Love you!
Thank you Jenny! I'll forever treasure the time you spent with me last Saturday. Thanks talaga! (",)
Shie made a gift for me: "Riz going on 26." It has a picture of Jennifer Garner's body and my face. At the back is a poem she wrote for me. Grabe, ganda! I'll show it to you one of these days...
Yes, I'll have my picture professionally taken...someday. Ewan ko ba. Ayoko lang talaga ng picture ko! Picture of places I've been to or friends is okay with me, but not a picture of myself. Kahit sa phone ko, wala akong masyadong picture ng sarili ko. But, someday...
Thanks for being such a great friend Jenny! I love you too! mwah!
hi te... u asked me to post my bday wish here... hehe im 2 months late!!! sori, ive been busy...
but anyway, i wish that u wont change. i wish u wont get tired of taking care of us. love you!
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